I Once Had Beef With Fellow Trans People. Now? I’m Squashing Them All.
Katelyn Burns on the urgency of squashing beefs with other trans people in the face of unprecedented attacks on the community under Trump 2.0.
by Katelyn Burns
As with any online community, trans people have our beefs. Some petty, some more serious, we all clash with each other from time to time. I’d rather not name names, but I’ve had blow ups both big and small with a wide variety of “publicly known” trans people over the years, most of whom I’ve met face to face before.
It’s only natural when you end up spending years sharing online space covering the same political issue as a couple dozen others. Heck, even Evan, the founder of Assigned Media, have had our clashes before, though none have ever risen to the level of actual vitriol or blocking each other. Though I do vaguely remember unfollowing him in a petty baby rage. (Evan notes, “I was probably wrong about something.” I was probably wrong about something too, people are allowed to disagree online!)
Most people would not know about these clashes, as there was maybe a vague subtweet here or there. I tend to not publicly call out other trans people if I can help it (except for you, Brianna Wu).
But earlier this year, with the Trump regime in its ascendancy and trans people their first targets, I made a conscious choice to put aside my petty trans community squabbles. It started with a well known blogger with whom I’ve had some criticisms over the years. I DMed her one day and just let her know that I wanted to have more solidarity amongst other trans journalists and that we were all on the same side in the face of Trump 2.0.
One by one, I squashed my beefs. Eventually I reached out to a prominent trans woman who I used to be friends with in DC whom I had a falling out with over half a decade ago. She had wronged me personally once long ago, and then again a few years later, but thinking it over to myself once the feelings cleared, I didn’t treat her very kindly in the fallout either.
Seven years ago, before Covid, I was quite full of myself and feeling very righteous. That righteousness served me well when I was slaying conservative absurdities, but sometimes my friends and allies also got caught up in that energy. There will always, of course, be our common trans discourse-related disagreements: like over what level of or if trans medicalization is appropriate, the definition of transmisogyny and how it operates, or how important it is to engage with ideas about gender vs. focusing on trans people’s concrete medical needs. But that all seems less important now in the face of a conservative movement hellbent on stamping us out of society.
As trans people we will always have our differences, and disagree on the best way to move forward. Readers here will be well acquainted with the harms perpetuated by the Trump administration and other conservatives towards trans people, but it’s work recapping to illustrate the threat we are facing: the trans military ban, the deliberate targeting of blue state clinics providing gender affirming care for youth, the passport gender marker change ban. And they’re not even halfway through their Project 2025 agenda for erasing trans people from society. They’re using “pornography bans” to restrict all internet mention of trans people now.
If the other side wins, we’re all still going to be in the same camps together (yes even you, Brianna Wu).
There is no petty drama that transcends the threat we face from outside our trans community and so we simply must stick together and look out for each other.
This is a fight for survival, and there’s only going to be one winner. It’s either us or them. So let’s let go of our grievances with each other and start working together, despite our differences.
With all that being said, I’m excited to announce a collaboration between myself, my podcast Cancel Me, Daddy, and Assigned Media. From now until 9/8/2025, Assigned Media is offering 50% off memberships by following this link. And I’m offering the same. You can sign up for annual memberships to both my writing and podcast Patreons at 50% off by clicking the links below and using code ASSIGNED at check out.
Yes I have two Patreons, it’s complicated. My writing Patreon features fewer perks for paid subscribers and all of my newsletter posts are free with no paywall, but the funds go directly towards paying my bills. The Cancel Me, Daddy Patreon has tons of cool perks, including access to the show Discord server, early access to all new episodes, and access to a member exclusive live show once a month. Use code “ASSIGNED” at check out for the discount!
We’re looking forward to welcoming Assigned readers to our weird little community. :)
Katelyn Burns is a freelance journalist covering trans issues and columnist for MSNBC and Xtra. She co-hosts the Cancel Me, Daddy podcast.